Lasting Memories Dr. Juan Harrison

Driving down the highway the other day my spouse of fifty years mentioned a close brush with death as a teen.  It dawned on me that I had never heard that story before.  That’s kind of a big deal.  Momentarily I felt a little miffed that she had never thought to share it with me.

Later as I sat across from her in a nice restaurant on an infrequent date night, I looked across the table and it hit me.  Most of us have had that moment when you wanted to ask Mama about something, but she had already departed or maybe was in the Home where you found it more and more difficult for her to verbalize a response to something you wanted to know about.  My wife said she remembered her first attempt at fixing dressing for the family at Thanksgiving on her own and couldn’t call on her mom for a little assistance in putting together the right ingredients.  For me, it was a question I had about something from our early farm days before she passed on.

Maybe some of you have already experienced a moment when you realized you wanted or needed to ask your spouse some question about something in their lives that you feel you should have known but waited too late to get the answer.  So much of our early years in our marriages are so jampacked with activity that we don’t often have time to engage in serious conversation or we’re likely to be interrupted by a demanding child wanting some money for something at school.

I often remind my Sunday school class to do a quick inventory of the status of our brain and our body to confirm at the moment that we still have the capacity to think and communicate.  We can’t take that for granted.  We’re not to live in fear, but we might give a little more thought about talking with our spouses about memories and experiences that they might share with us when the house is finally occupied by just the two of you.

At some point we may find ourselves unfortunately sitting in the recliner or rocker or on the couch with only the TV and remote to garner our attention.  At that point either you is or you ain’t.  NO amount of money can bring back that lifelong partner you came to share your deepest secrets, hopes, and dreams with.  Most likely they had tried to help make you happy and fulfill your dreams as much as possible.  Like the CD, money market, IRA, 401K and anything you put in the lockbox at the bank or in a shoe in your closet, it is what it is.  That stuff can’t hug you or rub your feet at bedtime.  When you pull up those covers at night, hopefully you’ve got a warm blanket of memories to dream on

By Dr. Juan Harrison